Milestones

 


Milestones are personal.  I recommend you keep track of milestones in your progress too.  Its helped me see how far I've come as I continue to develop as a person.  Here are milestones I've documented for myself.

Milestone 1. Getting attached to the process of talking about myself.  Pretty much as soon as I started talking regularly with someone safe I was hooked.  My life immediately improved having someone to talk to and eventually it led to depths I could never have imagined when I first started.  The key was talking with someone who wasn't judgemental, who didn't react to what I was expressing.   

Milestone 2. Feeling deep emotions in my mind while in the presence of someone safe.  Releasing! 

Milestone 3. Opening in the presence of someone safe, feeling emotions, and then resolving it in the presence of someone safe.

Milestone 4. Extending from doing the work in a safe environment with someone safe to doing the work at home by yourself.

Milestone 5. Opening out in the world.  Most often this occurs at work, when I started working with your emotions while on the job. 

Milestone 6. Releasing emotions by myself, shortening the time from event, reaction, and resolution.

Milestone 7. Spontaneously resolving emotions as they arose by myself.

Milestone 8. My efforts have resulted in a personality change. My reactions are now simply different, no longer tied to the old negative emotion. Fun and surprising!

Milestone 9. Working in my dreams or in a semi-conscious state.  Deep emotional work is done in this state.

Milestone 10. Seeing my innate positive human values including my conscience directly in a safe environment by yourself.  

Milestone 11. Understanding from a rational standpoint how to be my complete self. Seeing my happyness is governed by not just listening to my conscience but by living it as closely as possible and integrating it with the rest of me!

Milestone 12:  Living with beauty, the qualities that I discovered are becoming integrated into my life. Relax, take my time, enjoy every moment.

Milestone 13: Finding humility.

Milestone 14:  Working or opening while sleeping.

Milestone 15: Looking at emotional knots in my mind and trying to resolve them.  One of my later experiences was feeling the early relationship with my parents and feeling the outlines of its presence in my mind.  It was like dreaming of an asteroid in space, as I looked closer it was scary!  I sensed it was wrong.  It made me want to vomit it out,  yet I was afraid its so big it will choke me.  These types of visceral experiences are necessary to make progress at the deepest level.

Milestone 16:  Deep down there's a place in my mind that is complete bubbling chaos! Ideas have to come from somewhere, now I know where! 

Milestone 17: Understanding of my mind

Feelings are hierarchical, yet each feeling may be judged perfect for a particular circumstance.  Peace is a separate mental state free from emotions. Just away from peace, is beauty, love for all perceived, and a sensation of physical relaxation that is absolute.    Other innate feelings include a sense of fair play and freedom.  Chaos is an object inside my head, a random generator if you will.  These descriptions can help validate an individual, yet it is the act of experiencing these innate feelings and sensations that is truly important. 

 

The process of deeply meditating and becoming more aligned with your innate beauty can be very simple.  The process is reflecting upon yourself and your feelings. The crucial moment is the spontaneous transformation from negative feelings into positive feelings.  The operative word for this act is opening, opening up despite fear, opening up with fear.  When we open up deeply, we see our own beauty and our own ugliness.  In a flash of intense feeling, ugliness (as a feeling originated from a negative learned pattern) is transformed into beauty.  A more positive pattern is strengthened.  From beauty comes love and compassion.  I call this process of deep self inquiry with transformation opening. I open spontaneously and occasionally even continuously during daily life. Originally it occurred with someone safe present, then on my own at home, then by myself outside, and now when interacting with others.  I do it well because I have much to work on; I am healing quickly.  

Milestone 18 Hint of Realization / Integration

Integration across emotional levels of openness and integration between feelings and rationality, the merging of these different mental states not so much into one, but linked so closely that it takes no time to move between them and the ability to operate simultaneously within them.

Milestone 19 Extended experience with pure love

Milestone 20 Underpinning all relationships with loving-kindness

Opened up my heart even further, and after some wonderfully excruciating work, here I am, with a feeling of love for the world.  Nice to know you.  My improved outlook?  Underpinning all of my relationships with loving kindness.  I didn't know this, but once I did, it locked into place, a seamless fit. I feel euphoric, wish I knew how to write more about euphoria so I could stay with it while I'm writing, my heart is completely open, its almost like a heart stretch, you know when you get out of bed and stretch, only in this case its around my heart. I can't really imagine living here so I'm thinking I will return to that warm feeling of gentle love.

Milestone 21 Euphoria, The Sweet Spot of Life as an everyday experience.

Milestone 22 Physical relaxation increasing.  I am able to disconnect mind from body and in so doing find the mental tension and release it to a great depth than ever before.  It started with pretending to be dead in my mind as I focus on physical tension or pain in my body.  Somehow my mind accepts this trick and I can feel the connections of physical tension to mental tension and am able to release physical tension.

Dates of Progress

11/24/07 Started working with Lana Lensman 1.5 hours twice a week

01/01/08 It took me about six months to open up and experience opening like I'd never experienced it before.

07/01/08 On the last session with Lana, a year and a half twice a week,  I achieved complete peace with myself.

07/01/09  After approximately another year, I experienced direct awareness of my values or conscience.

1/1/10, I am approximately six months into the process of broadening and deepening myself.

4/14/10 Milestone 16 Chaos

06/08/10, Progress: much more joy in my life,  body language and manner is leading to strangers to spontaneously open up to me. Almost all experiences positive!

09/13/10 Milestone 17: Understanding the mind

10/09/10 Milestone 18: First hint of realization

2/5/11 Milestone 19:  Extended experience of pure love.

3/19/11 Milestone 20: Underpinning all relationships with loving kindness

9/1/11 Milestone 21: Euphoria as an Everyday Experience

10/16/11 Milestone 22: Physical relaxation

 

 

 

 

 

 

Home

 

 


skeyewater@gmail.com